Are You Dating a Player?
Emotionally Distant Partners and How to Spot Them
Before you fall too head over heals for your new love, you may want to first find out if they're going to be able to give you the kind of relationship you need.
If you feel they are a bit emotionally distant or perhaps even lying to you, take a look at the following signs to see if you may be dating a player.
You Feel Something Is Missing From Your Relationship
- It seems that the two of you are happy together. You have a great time and he or she really makes you smile. But there’s just “something” about the situation that doesn’t meet your emotional needs. When you want to talk about your day they don’t care to hear it. When you bring up a genuine concern about your relationship they make a joke of it or simply brush it off. You don't suspect them of cheating, but still, there's something that's just not quite right.
They Have a Hard Time Making Plans
- Your new partner may be great with last minute requests to see you, but when you try and pin them down for a future date, they balk. Players hate making plans because they feel something better may come along. They may hesitate to give you an answer until they get closer to the date and can safely say they have nothing better going on. Or, they simply refuse to commit and leave you hanging until the last possible minute. They may show up and save the day, or remain MIA and disappoint you.
Lots of People Seem to Know Them Well
- Players leave a trail of people behind them. Sometimes these folks can’t get the hint and try and hook up with your partner again, or sometimes they’ve been burned so bad they immediately become angry upon seeing your partner. Your partner may fail to introduce these folks, but even if he or she does they may ignore you or treat you poorly. If your new love seems to know a lot of "friends," and they’re all of the opposite sex, take note.
You Don’t Share Major Life Moments
- You suggest your partner accompany you to meet your cousins at the next family get-together, and they turn up their nose. You ask them to accompany you to a friend’s wedding, and they refuse or they go and behave bored or uninterested the entire night. It’s not only your special moments they don’t care to share, they also fail to let you in on their major life events. For example, they may fail to tell you they’ll be gone for a week on business or prefer to go to their parent’s anniversary party alone.
They Don’t Want to Talk About Your Relationship
- Communication is key when you’re a couple. Plain and simple, you need to talk about things to work them out. When you’ve met the right one, you both want to work on the relationship. It doesn’t have to be as dramatic as having a knock down, drag out discussion, but you do have to talk on some level. Issues that remain silent grow over time, and if your significant other simply refuses to address the problems you two seem to have, it may be because they simply aren’t interested.
Simple, Kind Gestures All Seem to Come From You
- Kindness goes a long way in a relationship. It’s the easy, thoughtful gestures that mean the most. Doing sweet little favors or buying small presents that mean a lot to your partner shows that you care about them and are paying attention. If you’re the only one that seems to be making dinner, giving small gifts, or remembering special moments you two have shared, it may be a sign that your partner is not as interested in you as you are in them.
You Have No Space in Their World
- You have to carry a bag of your essentials around town because your partner has no extra room in their drawer for you. Or perhaps you want a key to your mate’s place to make it easier for you both to hook up, yet your partner balks at this idea. If your man or woman can’t make literal space in their life for you, it may mean they don’t have the emotional space for you either. Emotionally unavailable also means unable to commit. And why waste your time with that when there are so many great people in the world who would love to meet you.
The copyright of the article Are You Dating a Player? in Dating Advice is owned by Cherie Burbach. Permission to republish Are You Dating a Player? must be granted by the author in writing.
