Clean Up Your Mess!

How Sloppiness Is Hurting Your Love Life

© Cherie Burbach

Aug 14, 2007
Can't seem to hold on to a relationship, and you don't know why? Maybe a few disorganized habits are to blame.

Messy areas of your life can give the impression that you just don’t care about things. And if you don’t care – why should anyone else?

Why put someone off before they’ve even had a chance to meet you? Instead, see if one of the following describe your messy trouble area and learn how you can clean it up.

Messy area: Your finances.

Credit problems, overspending, and late payments can be a red flag for potential partners that perhaps you’ve got a lazier faire attitude about life. If you don’t take paying your bills seriously, maybe it’s a sign that you won’t take the relationship seriously either. After all, if your partnership is ever to progress, you will in all likelihood be sharing expenses and money one day. Regardless of what got you in financial trouble, a potential partner may balk at getting serious or in taking on a huge chunk of your debt.

  • What to do: Get a handle on your spending habits by writing down every dollar that leaves your wallet. Investing in a software program like Quicken may help you track expenses. Knowing where your money is going is the first step to keeping it. There are several books on the market that can help you deal with personal finance. A credit counselor may also be a good idea if you’re seriously in debt.

Messy area: Cluttered living space.

In many ways, your home reflects your personality and zest for life. But if your house is a disorganized mess, you probably don’t want to be there and certainly don’t want to show it off to other people. If your significant other can’t be comfortable in your abode, they may subconsciously take it as a sign that they won’t be at home in your life, either. Besides that, hunting for your checkbook, keys, or wallet amidst the piles of rubble isn’t exactly a good use of your time.

  • What to do: In a word: Purge! Organization is a hot topic today and several television shows (like Neat) give great tips on cleaning up your surroundings. It isn’t just about being messy. The key is to figure out why you’re keeping things you probably should have thrown out years ago. If you can’t immediately use it or it doesn’t bring you happiness, toss it. Make a commitment to organizing your space, and your entire life will seem much freer.

Messy area: Disheveled personal hygiene.

Besides the obvious – who wants to kiss someone who stinks? – a problem with bathing, haircuts, or untidy appearance hold you back from feeling confident and putting your best foot forward. If you don’t feel good about yourself, how can you expect someone else to?

  • What to do: When singles have had a hard time with relationships, it can at times trigger depression. One symptom of this is simply ignoring your body. If you feel you might be slipping into despair seek out professional counseling so you can get back to your old self. When you’ve taken care of things in your life, then you can begin to date again.

The copyright of the article Clean Up Your Mess! in Dating Advice is owned by Cherie Burbach. Permission to republish Clean Up Your Mess! in print or online must be granted by the author in writing.


Sloppy and Single, Pontus Edenberg
       


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