How to Break Up with Your Boyfriend

Tips on Ending a Relationship Effectively

Jan 15, 2009 Adrienne Farricelli

Breaking up is never an easy task. There is no secret remedy or magic word to make it easier. However, the pill can be slightly sugar coated.

So that dreadful day has come. After evaluating the pros and cons of your relationship and trying to bind together irreplaceable pieces, you have decided it is time to break up with your significant other. While the decision may be crystal clear to you, putting your thoughts on stage may feel like a difficult task. Perhaps because you ultimately know that however you put it and whatever wording you use, the ultimate message remains the same: you no longer want to be with this person.

Breaking up is a dirty job indeed. You do not want to hurt the affected person's feelings but yet, you are fully aware of the fact that there really is no secret recipe or magic word to get the job done, other than trying your best in cushioning your words to lessen the impact.

Avoid Shortcuts When Breaking up

Many would wish to break up via text message, e-mail or IM, yet this is not the nicest way to go. Your partner may feel betrayed and breaking up will be perceived more like abandonment. Breaking up face to face, is a more honest approach and will provide each other a sense of closure.

Use the Honesty Policy

Of utmost importance is telling the truth. Be direct and do not show any signs of indecision. You want to be firm on your thoughts, yet tactful. There is no need to dig deep and provide elaborate explanations, just be straightforward and let your feelings talk for you.

Lock your Heart up and Toss the Key

Being extra nice will do no good. Actually, it may give the other the sensation that you are second guessing your decision. Don't start the "I need time to think it over" cliche'. This will be perceived as if you are leaving the door slightly open to hopes.

Give Friendly Options When Ending Your Relationship

Many women and men try to make the process less traumatic by offering their friendship. While this may be thoughtful, some individuals can see behind the sugar coating and would rather cut off the whole relationship than remaining friends. And this is perfectly fine, if not better. Others may accept your support instead, but watch it: they may try sabotaging your friendship into an effort of getting you back.

Provide Explanations on Why You are Leaving Him

Make sure to give valuable explanations as to why you are breaking up. Nothing feels worse than being left in limbo without a plausible explanation. This would cause your ex to think over and over about why and how this happened and what could have been done to prevent the break up in first place. Just be honest and keep it short.

Open the Air Vents

Let him talk and vent off his grief. Breaking up is a challenging process especially when people grow so emotionally attached. Let him ask questions and open up the conservation as to why it is better to put the relationship to an end.

Avoid Yo-Yo Effects

Be determined to break up. Don't break up and get back again. This will only prolong an already pitiful situation. Breaking up and coming back, creates a frustrating yo-yo effect which will wreck only havoc in both your lives.

Breaking up can be a hard enough process. However, it is only a one time ordeal. Don't postpone and mull over it day after day. If you are determined, do it now, cold turkey and without much fuss. Simply talk about your feelings and walk away without looking back....

The copyright of the article How to Break Up with Your Boyfriend in Dating is owned by Adrienne Farricelli. Permission to republish How to Break Up with Your Boyfriend in print or online must be granted by the author in writing.

Breaking up can be a thorny situation...