Dating the Wrong People

The Nanny, The Ex’s Pals, and More

Apr 13, 2008 Cherie Burbach

People you just shouldn't date.

Have you fallen for someone and now wonder if you may be crossing a line by seeing him or her romantically? Not every person you have feelings for is the right one to date. Here are some people to avoid when it comes to the question of starting a relationship.

Your Nanny

It’s easy to see how feelings can develop for the folks you pay to care for your children. After all, you hired someone that would love and tend to your kids the same as you would and that’s bound to bring up feelings of tenderness in you. Couple that with the reality that a nanny will likely spend time in your home and become a quasi part of your family, and you’ve got a recipe for trouble.

Your kids will become very confused when they see you displaying mushy feelings for the lady they look to for support on their behalf. A nanny is a sacred part of the household, so don’t distract her by making her pay more attention to you than she does to your children. She isn’t meant to be your partner.

Your Boss

Any person who has authority over you is generally a poor choice when it comes to romance. The lines of appropriateness get crossed, because even with the best of intentions favoritism is bound to rear its head. You may think you really earned that bonus over the rest of the staff, but how will you ever know for sure? Also, if you happen to break up, is your job then in jeopardy?

Your coworkers will resent the closeness you have with your boss and begin to treat you differently as well. No one likes to know that another person is talking to their boss about them, and when you date someone in authority at work the subject of the office will naturally come up.

Your Best Friend’s Ex

In general, it’s best to stay away from anyone that dated one of your friends. Of course, there are exceptions to this rule and that depends on the individual circumstances of the break up, the amount of time the relationship lasted, and the time that has passed since your friend has seen or talked to their ex. Anyone that your friend was in love with, had a long-term relationship with, or has kids with is someone to avoid romantically.

However, if your friend dated someone casually for a short time, it’s generally considered okay to get involved. Still, it’s a good idea to talk to your friend before you proceed. Even if the person in question is a long-forgotten flame, your friend won’t want to be taken by surprise when you show up on his or her arm at a party.

Your Ex’s Friends

The “do unto others” rule applies to this scenario. Would you want your ex girlfriend or boyfriend going on dates with your pals? It’s not that your ex will be jealous necessarily, rather, he or she will probably just feel very weird seeing someone they were once with hanging around their social circle. Once a break up happens, it’s usually a good idea to part ways and go back to your separate lives.

Your Kid’s Friends

You may feel young at heart, but to your children you are a generation older and should not dip into their pool of friends to find romance. Even if you imagine there is a spark with one of their pals, do your grown up child a favor and let him or her live their lives without you hanging around and hitting on their cronies.

The bottom line is that even if you suddenly have feelings for someone, it doesn’t mean it’s appropriate to start up a romantic relationship. There are plenty of ways to meet people today. Choose a partner that will bring you happiness without causing additional drama in your life.

The copyright of the article Dating the Wrong People in Dating is owned by Cherie Burbach. Permission to republish Dating the Wrong People in print or online must be granted by the author in writing.

It's a Bad Idea to Date One of Your Kid's Friends	Your Nanny Is Not a Good Choice for a Relationship	Never Date Someone in Authority at Work
Move On From Your Ex and Don't Date Their Friends	Keep Your Friendship Alive & Don't Date Their Ex