Dating can be extremely successful or a complete disaster, and everything in between. Fortunately, while dating etiquette is complex and forever changing, “there are still a few universal dos and don'ts of dating upon which many singles — and experts — can agree,” notes Carolyn Campbell in her article titled “The New Dating Rules,” published on Discovery Health. Here are six universal rules of dating that can increase the odds of making one’s experience a time to remember.
Dating Rules – Dos
After a great date, it is like floating on cloud nine. Everyone and everything seems merrier and there is not a care in sight. Nothing, not even the cell phone bill, can break the spell. The following universal dating rules, which indicate what one should do on a date, can increase the odds of making it just such a positive experience.
- Be genuine. In her article titled “Top Ten Dating Mistakes,” published on Cognitive Therapy Associates’ Web site, Psychologist Dr. Allison Conner stresses that “you will get further in less time in finding a relationship if you allow yourself to be genuine. It's OK to put your best foot forward, and also to be a bit cautious, but have the courage to be upfront and show who you are.” In essence, pretending to be someone else when dating is an exercise in futility if the aim is building a long-lasting and meaningful relationship.
- Communicate. Successful dates and successful long-term relationships have one thing in common: people who practice the art of good communication. Central to good communication is listening, a faculty too seldom used today. Listen, contemplate and thoughtfully respond: repeat throughout the evening.
- Have fun. Dating should be fun, not feel like boot camp. Relaxing and concentrating on having a good time will put both sides at ease and make the evening more enjoyable.
Dating Rules – Don’ts
Everyone has had them, those dates that are better forgotten: if only they could be forgotten. Despite one’s best efforts, they surface now and again in the wee hours of the morning, or during the day at work, causing brief fits of nausea and cold sweats. These universal dating rules, which specify what should not be done on a date, will help ensure less of these unhappy experiences and more rendezvous that are nothing less than blissful.
- Avoid overexposure. Discussion of previous relationships, financial standing and other such personal matters should not be brought up in detail in the initial phase of a relationship. Dates are a way of gauging broad compatibility: physical and mental attraction, likes and dislikes and mutual interests. Too many deep details can spoil the fun and spontaneity of getting to know one another and kill the attraction, if there is any.
- Never lie. When it is discovered that lying has taken place on a date, and it will be discovered sooner or later, trust is broken and things can only go downhill from there. One has every right to politely refrain from answering personal questions, particularly during the early stages of dating. But lying is not acceptable under any circumstances.
- Stay focused. Both parties on a date deserve one another’s utmost respect and attention. Being distracted by one’s cell phone, ogling people nearby and allowing the eyes to wonder all spell disrespect and will go a long way toward ensuring a negative outcome.
Dating Rules Can Ensure a More Successful Outcome
Dating, whether loved or loathed, is a necessary part of the relationship process. It is why many people are here today. The experience should be a fun and adventurous one, but oftentimes it turns out quite the opposite. While no rules of dating will guarantee success, these universal dating rules can help to make the experience more positive.
Don’t forget to check out these other helpful Suite101 articles that provide more useful information on dating: Where to Find a Date, Guide to Free Online Dating Services and Ten Fun Date Ideas.
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